I wanna start out by saying a HUGE thank you to all you guys who decided to follow me. I really didn’t think I’d ever reach 100 followers. But the fact that you like my spastic posts enough to be notified when I post and read my minds ramblings is just so cool and humbling.
It really motivates me to keep going and shows that even though I don’t have a structured blog with a particular theme, what I say still reaches people.
My whole goal with this blog was to speak my mind on any given topic, or aspect of my life, and maybe others could relate to it. To know that they aren’t alone in feeling depressed, or down, or numb, or struggling with recovery.
The way I write is as if I’m talking to a close friend. It’s very open and honest. I don’t want my blog to just seem like it’s one person writing for a classroom. The more personal it is, the more genuine.
And I’m not chastising the way other people do their blogs, not at all. This is just how I do mine. I actually admire those who have a structure and common theme to their posts. It’s organized and you can rely on it. Mine is just kinda, topic of the day or what I’m feeling right now, kinda thing.
Small but Unique
I know that doing things differently usually won’t get you popular or up on the top boards. On Twitch for example, the most popular streamers are the ones who play games like Fortnight, CSGO, COD, WOW, LOL. I don’t play those. I like doing my own games, indie games that are unique and more unknown. No you don’t get any points for individuality, but the followers you do make, are more solid and seem closer in a sense.
With blogging it’s similar, you have people who do awesome book reviews and anime reviews and movie reviews, because that’s what a lot of people want. They find a person who’s opinion they respect and take into account what their view is on something when choosing to view it themselves.
I suppose for me, what I like to do, is read/watch whatever it is first, and then go look at others opinions and see what they thought of the film. I find that vastly more interesting. So my mind isn’t influenced by the opinions of someone else straight away.
I don’t like being influenced by others on tv/movies/anime because I want it to be mine to experience with no other pretense to cloud the content.
As far as I’ll go is to see the score a website or something gave to the movie, and I don’t like to do that much anymore either. It’s usually only if I’m gonna pay money to see it.
Everyone is different and a lot of people can cater to what the vast majority of people want.
I wouldn’t exactly say I have that talent. My opinion tends to be unrestrained and unfiltered. Which a lot of people find off putting and don’t like how blunt I can be. Which I understand.
I think sticking to your guns is the best way to go in the end. Just do what you feel like. What your gut says is a good move to make. You more than likely won’t become popular by being unique and doing what others don’t. But I find solace in the people who do follow me because I feel like they understand my style and enjoy my vibe.
It’s more personal and really makes me happy to know that others are on the same page as me. Even if you just relate to one post, that’s a victory to me.
I don’t wanna influence people to think the way I do or be like me, I want people to make up their own minds. To see different sides, different perspectives, to weigh it all and then boil down their personal conclusion. What strikes you? What just jumps out at you and speaks to your own points of view?
Too me, that is the mark of a truly smart person. Someone who wants to see every side possible in a situation, then makes their own conclusions. If all you see is one side of the spectrum, you’re choosing to be ignorant. It’s a lazy way of thinking. You just want that one side to think for you and make up your mind for you, so you don’t have to put in the work yourself.
As long as people come at you from a place of respect and calm vibes, give them a shot and hear their side. I love hearing others opinions and views on things, having a mature conversation that isn’t just a bunch of “I’m right, you’re evil and stupid, shut up” crap.
It took me a while to find my own voice and style. As well as the confidence to not give a fuck about the negative things people think about me.
No I’m not Prom Queen, I’m not Popular Penny, but at least I know who I am and wanna own it. I’m still shy and self conscious about some things, but I’ve got my head on straight. Ears open, eyes alert, in my own zone, jamming to what ever the fuck drum beat I wanna.
It’s already nearly halfway through November and I’m just not on the level. My mind isn’t clear, I’m lagging big time. Can’t focus, in and out of mild depression spells that put the whole day on hold. Yet still, I wanna try and make a couple goals to achieve.
1- Watch one episode of a new anime
2- Watch one horror movie I haven’t seen
3- Post all I can to EBay before Black Friday
4- Start jogging at least every other day
5- Write a new poem
6- Plan trip to Missouri
Those seem reasonable, very doable. Just try and accomplish these between the other stuff I’ve got going on.
These may seem like trivial things to a lot of people, but battling your body and mental state everyday, you get wore down and just don’t wanna do anything, fun or not.
Starting out small is the best way to build up confidence in yourself.
Thanks Again!!!! On to another 100!!
It’s 1pm on this gloomy Sunday, but I’m gonna make the most of it regardless.
Get dressed, put on my corset, and seize the day.
To all my followers out there, and those who just past by and decide to read this, Thank you.
I hope if anything, this was an enjoyable read for you, I’ll continue on in my spastic fashion guaranteed.
If you want, feel free to comment anything you’d be curious my take on, I’d be happy to take suggestions. I think it’d be really cool actually to do topics suggested by people. ^-^/
Leave a comment!
And I’ll leave it with- Find your vibe, and ride it~