It’s been a few days since my last post, I have been doing some productive things though. Working on my house and eBay store. I managed to wake up at 9am today so I got an early start.
Sunday has always been my most hated day of the week back for as long as I can remember. Growing up, I would have to wake up and help my dad put away the groceries super early because my mom was to lazy. It pissed me off every week to hear her yelling “get up and help your dad!” As if he couldn’t do it by himself or your lazy ass couldn’t help. My dad would spend the day watching sports or making mixed cds for himself of old vinyl records. My mom would hopefully stay in her office and be on the computer, away from my dad so no fights would ensue.
My mom hates my dad and has no problem showing it. She also has severe anger issues and is quite frankly the most terrifying person when she’s mad and yelling. My dad couldn’t really fight back, there’s no point because she’s just unreasonable. But the cops were called many times over their stupid bullshit.
I grew up in an extremely hostile and tense environment. Constantly under stress, walking on pins and needles, waiting for the next drop. If my mom wasn’t laid up in bed demanding room service, she was yelling, and on some days, she would be relatively calm. I preferred her distracted on the computer, away from me and not having another anger episode.
My dad and I have never been close, he has little to no depth to him and thus we just talk about shallow on the surface shit. He was incredibly neglecting and cared more about the TV than me. Any time I came in from outside badly hurt, he didn’t care and I was left to clean and bandage myself. I could go on and on but this is already morbid enough aha.
The vibe of Sunday has just stuck with me throughout my life. It’s unpleasant and oppressive feeling. I just want to sleep it all away. My body just refuses to put forth any energy, so I struggle all day. Already my eyes want to shut, so I’ll end it here with- Sunday was never a fun day🍂
#sunday #deep #tired #depression #sad #growingup #childhood #memories #daily #life #pain #update #new #somber